body image

now i know why women have body image issues. they get them from their mothers. my mom left yesterday after visiting for a week and a half (way too long). while she was here, we got into a broiling fight. i walked half a block behind her for the better part of a 30 minute walk home, and circled the block afterward. 

what started off as a fight about eyebrows (not anything new) turned into a fight about everything else. all the old insecurities rose up to choke me, and there i was, 13 again, throwing a 13-year-old's tantrum. she made it worse by saying how she only wanted me to be more pretty; prettier. yeah, whatever.

but then i wonder, do women really get their body image issues from their mothers? that sparked a wider discussion. one (tiny) friend tells me that her mother likes to pinch her fat and comment on the weight she's gained. another friend tells me how her parents have been nothing but supportive and loving all her life. i tell her i want to trade. 

the friends who tell me their mothers have never said anything against their appearance (other than "that's beautiful, you look perfect!"), also remarked how their families were so supportive and tolerant as to possibly not give them the direction they needed...or the constructive criticism they craved. maybe that's a sign of closeness, of intimacy. i'm not really sure. at any rate, we didn't have another fight the rest of the time she was here.